Out of Time
by Red Star Rising
Summary: Lisbon recounts how they got Red John.. really not as boring as that sounds
1. I: Prologue

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

This is just the prologue by the way, obviously there is more to come.

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**Case Number**: _0019737653_

**Case Type**_**: **__Serial Murder, "Red John" killings_

**Date of First Kill:** _05/11/1998_

**Lead Agent****: **_Teresa Lisbon, Samuel Bosco Jr. _

**M.O.**: _Female victims (usually) stabbed and cut in a frenzy with subsequent abuse of the viscera. Afterwards a smiley face is drawn on the wall in the victim's blood. He has also in some cases painted a victim's toenails in their own blood and used a gun on occasion._

**Known Associates**: _Orville Tanner, Dumar Hardy, Rosalind Harker, Rebecca Stanton, Boris Feldor, __Michelle Maitland_

**Number of Known Victims**: _28_

**Identity**: _Jesse Maitland_

**Date Apprehended**: _10/23/2010_

**Arresting Officer**: _Teresa Lisbon_

**Died**: _10/25/2010_

**Additional Information**:

_Red John was shot dead by Agent Kimball Cho after he tried to escape custody._

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I smiled proudly to myself as I watched Cho hand Hightower the file, Red John was dead and Jane was not going to go to jail, how could I not be proud? Hightower didn't look impressed however, she looked as deadpan as Cho as she scanned the file.

"That's it?" Hightower complained, "that's all you put in additional information."

"I didn't think I needed to go into detail," Cho answered blandly.

"Boss how can you obsess over paperwork?" I wondered, "we stopped a serial killer, a very psychotic and dangerous serial killer."

"I suppose it'll suffice," Hightower muttered stiffly, "how's Jane doing?"

"Still in a coma," Cho replied sadly, "they don't know if he'll make it or not."

"Of course he'll make it, he's Jane," I told them forcefully.

"We have to think positive Agent Cho," Hightower told him with a sympathetic look, "I think enough good agents have died already."

"Yes ma'am," Cho agreed with a hint of sadness in his tone.

"Yes, Sam and his team didn't deserve to die like that," I confirmed flashing back to my mentor. I truly hoped Jane would pull though, he had too.

"I still need a verbal account of what happened," Hightower announced leaning back in her chair.

"Can't it wait?" Cho complained tiredly, "it's been a really long day."

"Yeah, I can fill you in boss," I informed her and watched her she pondered it thoughtfully.

"Okay," Hightower reluctantly agreed, "you can go."

Cho inclined his head in gratitude and stalked out of her office, I scowled after him. He must really be worried about Jane, I was too but I had faith he would be okay. I would obviously go check on Jane when I was done debriefing Hightower but he had to be okay, the handsome blond hero always was okay.

I felt myself blushing and wondered how that thought had popped into my head, I felt my blush deepen when I realized I was still standing in front of my boss. I quickly dropped onto the seat in front of her and cleared my throat.

"Okay so it all started a few days ago…"


	2. II: Taking the Bait

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

Thank you Anna for reviewing

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"Okay so it all started a few days ago, the 22nd of October. It was late and dark outside, as usual I had worked my way through the evening on paperwork. The team had long since left to go home except for Jane who was lazing about on his couch as usual, nothing at all out of the ordinary.

I was just getting my stuff to leave when the phone rang, I answered it reluctantly hoping it wasn't a new case and I got my wish but Red John is a case that always makes your stomach turn to ice.

`Lisbon,` I stated.

`I-I Know who Red John is,` the speaker had told me nervously.

`You know who Red John is?` I'd repeated doubtfully.

`Yes, he was my friend,` the person had continued, `until I realized who he was… he told me if I didn't kill Rebecca then he'd kill my whole family… I-I'm so sorry.`

`You're admitting to murder?` I'd wondered trying to figure out if he sounded plausible or not.

`I was scared!` the speaker had wailed, `but I feel so guilty about it, and about all the innocent people he's killed… I really want to help you.`

`So what's his name?` I'd demanded with an increasing heart rate.

`I'd rather tell you in person,` he'd said worriedly, `I-if he bugged my phone then he might already be on his way here to kill me.`

`We'll protect you, tell me his name and I'll drive over to your house right now,` I'd offered figuring if he refused to give a name then the call was probably bogus.

`Okay, okay,` he'd agreed to my mild surprise, `his name is Jesse Maitland, now please come. Hurry.`

After that he'd given me his name, Boris Felder and his address. I'd reassured him again I was on my way and had hung up on him immediately punching in Cho's number. He hadn't answered so I'd left him a message saying we were going to check out Boris' story and that he should get Rigsby, Van Pelt and look into Jesse Maitland, then I'd rushed out to tell Jane.

`Why do you look so excited?` he'd inquired scowling.

`Got a call from this person, claims to be an accomplice of Red John,` I'd told him failing to suppress the surge of hope I felt at finally closing in on Red John, `going to go talk to him now, he said Red John is actually Jesse Maitland.`

`This is one lucky break,` Jane had whispered, `if its genuine.`

`That's why we're going to go talk to him,` I'd explained, `you coming?`

He'd jumped to his feet and we'd both left hurriedly to get to the address Felder had given me. It wasn't in Sacramento, in retrospect zooming off in the middle of the night to an address in the middle of nowhere was probably not the best idea in the world but Jane and I both were on a buzz from the fact we might actually catch him. While I obviously don't have the history with Red John that Jane does, I have still developed a strong desire to catch the sonofabitch if only to save lives, sooth Jane's broken heart and get justice for Sam.

Anyway, eventually we arrived there and as I said it was way off the beaten track, right next to an old abandoned mine. It was more of a run down shack than a house but at the time I figured Felder was probably hiding out there because he was scared of Red John.

`Boris Felder?` I'd called strolling towards the shack with Jane in tow, `its Agent Teresa Lisbon of the CBI, we spoke on the phone.`

After there was no answer I began to feel worried and judging by the anxious look in Jane's desperate eyes he was too. I knocked loudly on the door and it swung open, the lock had long ago rusted away and by the sound of the screeching hinges they were pretty rusted too.

I'd pulled my gun and entered the hut, I heard a scream coming from behind the door on the opposite wall and had run towards it. Only stopping in my tracks when I heard the door behind me slam shut, me and Jane had both spun to see a man in a gas mask standing in front of the door as he throw something at us.

Before I could react a blinding flash of light blasted from it, I yelped and dropped my gun while the gas filled the room. I blinked to try and clear my vision seeing only clouds of smoke and the blurry image of Jane who was swaying on his feet, my own legs started to wobble and I suddenly felt very, very tired. I couldn't stop my eyelids from fluttering closed…"


	3. III: Killer's Captives

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

This is a longer chapter, I hope you don't mind.

Thank you Anna, In the Name, Mentalgal and Jisbon4ever for reviewing, really thank you I didn't think anyone would read this let alone like it.

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"I woke up when I felt someone slap me hard making my cheek sting painfully as I blinked the sleep out of my eyes. I remember my head throbbed painfully and I groaned slightly before I was struck again, this time I forced my eyes open to see a stranger standing in front of me. He had dark auburn hair with sapphire colored eyes and I might have considered him handsome if not for the slightly deranged way he was grinning at me.

`Nice for you to awaken,` he commented, `Agent Teresa Lisbon, I believe? I would offer to shake your hand but then I'd have to untie you and then you'd try escape and then I might have to hurt you and that would be a tremendous shame now, wouldn't it?`

As he spoke I frantically scanned my surroundings, I was still in the shed where I'd been when I'd collapsed but daylight now streamed through the windows rather than thick blackness and I was of course tied to a chair. I couldn't see Jane but when I moved my hand I noticed someone else's hand, he had tied us back to back.

`My, my ever so quiet,` the man continued who I figured correctly was either Boris Feldor or Red John and since it wasn't Feldor's voice… `they say the eyes are the window to the soul, in that case Teresa I think you have a very beautiful soul,` he continued stepping forwards to caress my cheek which I violently flinched away from.

`Don't touch her!` Jane had shrieked defensively, confirming he was tied to the chair behind me, accompanied by the sound of someone punching him.

`Shut up!` snarled Feldor, `the master is talking.`

`As in Red John?` I'd whispered turning back to look at my captor who nodded and widened his smile, `you're Jesse Maitland.`

It was the first time Red John looked shocked, he blinked in confusion and scowled slightly before casting a dark look behind me, where Feldor must have been standing.

`Why do they know my name Boris?` Red John asked calmly, his eyes suddenly burning with an icy blue coldness.

`Well… err… I,` Feldor had spluttered nervously, `I had to… erm… tell them so that they… err…. Would… you know… come here… If you're going to kill them anyway does it really matter if they know your name?`

`Boris, you're an idiot,` Red John had snapped simultaneously drawing a gun and firing it behind me, he was a good shot because it was followed by a loud thump of Feldor's body falling to the ground and then nothing, `he was becoming useless anyway,` he added placing the gun- my gun- onto a small table beside him.

`So you're going to kill us?` Jane had wondered after a minute with an edge of anger in his tone, `why bother tying us up, you despicable coward.`

`Now Patrick play nice,` Red John mocked grinning yet again to which I heard Jane spitting, `you know how I can't stand to be insulted, it makes me get a little knife happy and it would be a shame to have to hurt cut up Agent Lisbon's pretty face,` with that he strode over to me and dragged the blade slowly down my cheek, I felt a slight sting before a thin trail of blood rolled from the wound, `any more than I already have that is.`

`Bastard,` I heard Jane mutter.

`What was that Patrick?` Red John asked curiously.

`Nothing,` Jane replied, `just tell us what you want.`

Music suddenly broke the otherwise intense atmosphere, it was so weird hearing such a peaceful tune after Red John had just killed a man and sliced me with a knife, it was the same tune playing when we discovered Hicks' body, Bach. It was a minute before I realized it was coming from a cell phone.

`Just let me get that,` Red John said with a hint of annoyance as he pulled the phone from his pants pocket and moved into the second room to answer the call.

`Are you okay?` Jane had inquired anxiously the second the door closed.

`Just a cut Jane, I'm fine,` I'd answered honestly with a sudden pulse of guilt, after all we might die and I had been stupid enough to wait for backup. I had really thought Feldor was in danger though, I swear.

`It's not your fault Lisbon,` he'd offered, he may claim to not be psychic but he still can guess what I'm thinking pretty easily.

`Feldor's dead isn't he?` I'd commented, at the time trying to change the subject.

`Yes,` he'd sighed in answer, `Red John would have killed him anyway, he only uses tools for as long as they're useful and Feldor… Lisbon pull that piece of rope on your left hand side.`

`What?` I'd asked in confusion.

`I've untied the rope, pull it and we'll be free,` he hissed quietly as realization dawned on me.

Wasting no time I pulled the rope which fell loosely to the ground, I rubbed my wrists momentarily before jumping to my feet and approaching the small table on which lay my handcuffs, badge and most importantly my gun which Red John had carelessly left lying there. I glanced briefly at Jane who seemed physically fine although I'm sure mentally he was suffering.

I motioned for Jane to stay back before opening the door and pointing my gun at Red John who was replacing the cell in his pants pocket when he saw me, he looked mildly surprised before laughing hysterically at some unknown joke. I was completely confused by his reaction, which put me off guard allowing him to grab a handful of dirt from the ground and throw it at my eyes.

I yelped blinking painfully while he bolted, immediately I chased after him with Jane hot on my heels. He weaved his way through the abandoned mine with ease while I fumbled along behind him full of determination, I was not about to let that bastard get away now. Red John made the mistake of tripping over a rock allowing me to tackle him.

Unfortunately for us all there was a mind shaft right beside the rock which of course I knocked Red John down it along with myself, I remember screaming as I fell abruptly crashing with Red John onto an old fashioned mining cage.

I groaned wincing at the bruises I'm sure I was now spotting and rolled off Red John noticing my gun was no longer in my hand, nor was it anywhere near me. Red John winced also placing a hand to an injury on his head while sitting up like me.

`Are you okay Jesse?` I asked panting and using his real name, which got me an indignant look.

`LISBON!` Jane bellowed panicked and I glanced up to see his silhouette on an otherwise perfect square of sunlight, `LISBON! CAN YOU HEAR ME?`

`YES!` I called back, `WE'RE BASICALLY OKAY! CAN YOU GET US UP?`

`THIS THING STOPPED WORKING A LONG TIME AGO,` Jane shouted hoarsely, `I'M GOING TO FIND SOME ROPE OR SOMETHING TO PULL YOU UP!`

`Not one of my better days,` Red John mumbled after a minute and I quickly found my handcuffs and cuffed him to the rusted cable in case he tried anything, `that's not really necessary you know? What am I going to do, from here?`

`I'd rather not take my chances with a psychopath like you,` I informed him.

`Nice,` he added sarcastically, `do you intend to just leave me here to die? That's not very professional of you.`

`When we get help they can deal with you, for now I'd rather make sure you don't try anything when Jane pulls me up,` I'd stated mildly interested while I tried to catch my breath.

`Get help? You realize I got rid of your cell phones and car while you were unconscious,` he'd pointed out, `Sacramento is miles away.`

`You should have thought of that before you decided to abduct us,` I'd snapped loathing having to converse with him, `I hope at the trial they give you the death penalty or at least to spent the rest of your life in a prison where you'll never see the light of day again-`

`GOT THE ROPE!` Jane announced loudly throwing it down to me, it barely reached us but it was the best we had.

`I'll come back for you Jesse,` I told the glaring serial killer before turning back up to Jane, `I'M COMING UP NOW!`

With that I started to climb the rope, what I didn't notice at the time was that the rope was old and worn, frayed in places. I managed to make it to the top of the shaft where Jane offered me a hand up which I gladly took but at that point the old rope must have had enough and proceeded to snap. I started to fall backwards and fearful of dragging Jane with me let go of his hand but it was too late anyway and we both tumbled down into the darkness to land with Red John who greeted us with gales of laughter.

`Oh shut up,` I'd moaned and I struggled to sit up along with Jane.

`I guess you came back for me sooner than you- what was that?` Red John began snapping to a worried tone when a loud groaning of metal ripped up the silence, `oh shit.`

In the next instant the cable gave way and the cage hurtled to the bottom of the shaft to the tune of our symphony of screams, loudly and violently it slammed into the ground forcing us to fly off it. My head collided with something hard and I blacked out again…"


	4. IV: Trapped but Alive

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

Thank you Jisbon4ever for reviewing

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"It must have been hours before I woke up, the first thing I heard was this irritating dripping sound accompanied by a sharp pain in my head. I remember wincing as I forced my eyes open to stare into the gloomy darkness. It was still daytime which is why there was still a faint glow of light but it was barely anything giving mostly shadowy images. The dripping was from the wall beside me where water was falling into a large puddle to my right.

I noticed my throat was parched and cupped my battered hands to drink some of the fresh and soothing water. After that I leaned back against the wall and studied my surroundings; the mining cage was pretty much destroyed with sections lying around near the initial crash site. Red John was still handcuffed to the cable, he looked about as rough as I felt and while his eyes were closed the rise and fall of his chest indicated he was in fact alive, unfortunately. I began worrying about Jane and noticed him deeper into the tunnel, sprawled out in the darkness.

`Jane?` I'd whispered crawling towards him and gently shaking his arm, `Jane? Are you okay?`

For a second I feared I had lost him but then his eyelids flickered and he opened his eyes groaning in pain at his injuries. I gave him some space and he sat up grimacing, he too looked pretty beaten up but at least he was alive which was the main thing.

`Are you okay?` I'd repeated.

`I'm alive,` he'd informed me wincing, `but I think my ribs are broken and my shoulder might be dislocated… you?`

`Oh stop being so insufferable,` Red John spat suddenly, `perfect Patrick can't stand a few bruises. Get over it.`

`Quiet you,` I'd snapped at him returning my attention to Jane, `I'm basically okay.`

`Good,` he muttered, `you're head's bleeding though, you should bandage it or something.`

`And we should pop your shoulder back in too,` I added before turning to Red John's direction, `how bad are you hurt?`

`Oh now I'm allowed to speak?` he retorted sarcastically.

`Just answer the damned question,` I'd told him tiredly.

`I'm basically okay,` he mimicked what I'd said, `apart from my ankle, I can't move it and I'm pretty sure its broken.`

`I hope it hurts,` Jane spat darkly.

`I think we should be more concerned about how the hell we get out of here,` Red John said changing the subject, `we can't climb back up and no one knows where here.`

`I told the team-` I'd began but Red John had interrupted.

`You told them my name was Jesse Maitland and that's why you were going to see Boris Feldor,` he informed me with a hint of annoyance, `Mother called to tell me CBI had been questioning her about it, they didn't have a clue where either of you were. Smart plan by the way, forget to tell your team where you were going, very careless. I expected better from you Agent Lisbon, you haven't even formally arrested me yet.`

`Fine. Jesse Maitland you're under arrest on 27 counts of murder, resisting arrest and federal kidnapping. You have the right to remain silent, anything you do say can and will be used against you in the court of law. You have the right to an attorney and if you cannot afford one then one will be appointed to you by the state,` I'd recited to him while secretly kicking myself for my error, `do you understand these rights as they have been read to you?`

`Yes,` he'd responded icily, `well done. Now how the bloody hell do you propose we get out of here?`

`Does your Mother know where we are?` Jane had asked after a minute.

`Of course not,` Red John scoffed, `you think I'd tell such a gullibly moronic woman where I had taken you? I don't tell her the intimate details of my work, that would be rather stupid as I'd have to kill her then which would bring too much unwanted attention to myself.`

`Does anyone know where we are? Another accomplice maybe?` I'd questioned ignoring the creepy way he spoke of killing his Mother like it was a normal thing.

`No. Boris was my only present accomplice as you'd say and he's pretty dead," Red John announced proudly, `our best bet would be to follow this tunnel and hope it leads out somewhere or at least where there's a cell phone signal…`"


	5. V: Plan of Action

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

I'm sorry this chapter sucks but its more of a filler

Thank you In The Name and Jisbon4ever for reviewing

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"`That's your plan?` Jane had snapped in reply, narrowing his eyes angrily at the serial killer, `wander around blindly through a maze of abandoned mining tunnels? That's the stupidest thing I've heard in my life.`

`Really? Oh what's your plan? Sit here and wait to die?` Red John replied bitterly.

`You're going to die anyway,` Jane had pointed out darkly, `I'm going to cut you open and watch you die slowly.`

`Jane!` I'd interrupted, `no one is killing anyone else.`

`Yes mother,` Red John had mocked smirking.

`Lisbon-` Jane had begun before I cut in.

`I don't care what he's done, I'm not letting you kill my prisoner in cold blood,` I informed him edgily, `but if he tries anything I will not hesitate to shoot him.`

`Try anything? Handcuffed to a broken mining cage with a broken ankle? How to you propose I try anything?` Red John wondered aloud.

`You sarcasm is dully noted,` I'd told him, `now shut up.`

`Your gun is in the pool of water by the way,` Red John pointed out, `in case you need it but since the gunpowder is wet it won't fire.`

`How useful,` I'd sighed glancing at the pool and noticing my gun which I retrieved shaking it in a vain attempt to dry it.

`Your sarcasm is dully noted Agent Lisbon,` Red John grinned.

`Shut up Jesse,`I'd moaned trying to decide what we should do, staying sounded like certain death but moving through the tunnels was only mildly better.

`Stop calling me Jesse,` Red John had complained.

`I think we should go through the tunnels,` I announced ignoring his complaints, `it's the best option I can think of we have to survive, there's a reason they're called abandoned mines.`

`I think it's a stupid idea,` Jane snapped childishly.

`You just don't want to admit I'm right,` Red John had stated, `that's extremely immature, even for you Patrick.`

`Stop this please, you're giving me a migraine,` I told them both rubbing my sore head, `this is a pretty horrible situation and we have to stay calm and work together… even if one of us is a sadistic murderer.`

`Who died and put you in charge?`

`Yes who?`

`I'm the least injured,` I'd invented standing shakily up noticing suddenly how much my left hand hurt to move, `now come on, let's pop your shoulder back in Jane.`

`You're just used to being beaten up,` Red John had pointed out, `Daddy's little girl.`

`Do you want us to leave you here to rot?` I'd snapped trying not to let him to me.

Thankfully he actually fell silent for a minute while I took Jane's arm and when he was ready popped it back into place, I knew how to do it because my youngest brother Tommy had dislocated his arm before and since Dad refused to take us to the hospital unless it was serious… never mind boss. Anyway when that was done I ripped off one of my sleeves and tied it around me head, it also made me realize that my left hand was twisted or broken maybe… I don't remember which," I stopped with my account for a moment to frown, "you'd think I'd remember which, wouldn't you? Probably whatever painkillers they've given me.

So then I had to deal with Red John. I was careful when I released him from the handcuffs but he didn't try anything, not that its surprising really since he was stuck there with his broken ankle anyway. He couldn't walk without me helping him, I do admit I liked the fact he winced in pain every step we took. If that makes me a bad person I guess I am but he deserved to suffer a little, although I was half expecting us to die in those tunnels.

`Can't we just leave him handcuffed here?` Jane had questioned me pleadingly.

`No Jane,` I'd sighed as I helped Red John sit beside the water pool, which he greedily drank from, `give me your jacket Jane.`

`You're just going to help Red John with it,` he'd snapped giving me a dark look, `how can you be helping him Lisbon? He's a serial killer? He killed my wife and child!`

`Jane,` I sighed, I know it was hard for him and I didn't want to help Red John particularly but I'm a cop and we can't just leave people to die even if they deserve it, `please Jane.`

He'd glared at me intently for a minute before taking off the jacket and angrily throwing it at me muttering furiously under his breath, I'd simply tried not to feel guilty as I attempted to bandage the wreck of his ankle. That I was less confident about but if he lost too much blood he'd pass out and be a dead weight for me to carry, I'm not exactly superwoman especially in that condition and even if Jane would have helped me his broken ribs would make it nearly impossible.

`Can we go yet?` Jane had complained after a minute.

`We can go,` I agreed helping Red John up as he groaned in pain, `take my flashlight Jane and walk ahead of us,` I'd told him handing it to him.

It wasn't very bright but it was better than nothing, our progress was still slow though. With me supporting Red John we obviously were slower than average and walking clearly aggravated Jane's ribs but he seemed to be mad at me and staggered on even though I said we could rest if it got too painful. I can't really blame him though, I was helping the man who murdered his family and he saw no reason why we shouldn't simply kill him. We traveled in basic silence too, Red John was too busy gritting his teeth against the agony but I kept refusing to let us stop to rest for him. We did stop to drink whenever we noticed pools of water however, never knew when they would stop appearing.

It was horrible boss, walking painfully through the murky blackness of those tunnels, every ugly gray rock looked the same as every other ugly gray rock. I really pity the people who had to work in those hellholes every single day…"


	6. VI: Through the Tunnels

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

The movie hasn't actually gotten anything to do with them stuck down a mine, its more to do with the story's premise. Next chapter you can probably guess what it is, if not I'll tell you in the one after

Thank you In The Name and Jisbon4ever for reviewing

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"It was exhausting trekking through the tunnels, as we got deeper the pools of water became more and more scarce while hunger gnawed away at my insides, bear in mind I hadn't eaten since lunch on the 22nd. It was very depressing also, the flashlight offered little in the way of brightness and around it darkness loomed everywhere with shadowy outlines teetering on the edges of my vision.

Jane was basically a silhouette I was following and even though Red John's face was only inches from own he was basically a shadow with glinting sapphires for eyes. I also hated the silence; Jane was still clearly mad at me for helping Red John and opted not to say anything while Red John too refrained from talking. I don't know what I would have liked to talk about but the silence just made our situation feel even more hopeless. What started off as tenuous hope for survival became more and more like certain death.

I don't know how long we walked as none of our watches had survived the fall, according to the file Cho handed you Red John died 3 days after we were taken so presumably we were down there for 2 and a bit days, it felt like a helluva lot longer though.

Injured, no food, no sleep, scarcely any water and having to support Red John eventually began to take its toll on me. My legs started to feel shaky and with each dizzying step I felt woozier, it worried me so I stopped walking for a minute and swayed unsteadily on my feet. It was suddenly so hard to fight off the desire to close my eyes, so hard to stop me legs from buckling.

`Err… Jane?` Red John had commented after the ex-psychic had carried on walking not noticing us stopping.

`Don't talk to me!` Jane had snapped in reply, `just go ahead and die you sick twisted son of a bitch!`

I finally couldn't stand anymore and crumpled to a heap on the ground. My strength sapped away and my fatigued limbs refused to budge even as Red John gently tried to shake me awake.

`Did I get my wish?` Jane's bemused voice had floated from afar.

`No you idiot,` Red John's voice had retorted, `your little girlfriend's collapsed.`

`Lisbon?` his frantic voice had questioned before a frenzy of hurried footsteps. He lifted me and held me gently close, `Lisbon? Lisbon, can you hear me? Lisbon?`

`M'okay,` I'd forced my thick tongue to mutter, `just… just let me… rest for… awhile.`

`This is why we need to get out of here fast, before we all succumb to exhaustion,` Red John's voice pointed out bitterly, `except we won't have the strength to carry on, even after some rest.`

`I hope that happens to you,` Jane's voice had snarled at the killer, `It'd be fun to watch you die.`

`It's always fun to watch someone die,` Red John had actually agreed and I can imagine the twisted smile he gave Jane with that statement, `but if we are in a situation where I'm certainly going to die, I swear to god I'm taking someone with me.`

`No killing… not while I'm… asleep,` I'd managed to murmur afraid I'd wake up to be surrounding by corpses.

`Do you still think I'd be stupid enough to try anything down here?` Red John had said snappily, `it'd mean certain death and if I do have to die I'd rather it be by light of day.`

I don't actually know if they just fell silent or if I lost consciousness but either way silence fell, again I don't know how long before I recovered my strength but when I did it was comforting that Jane was still cradling me in his arms even if it was pitch black now.

`What happened to the light?` I'd asked upon awakening.

`Turned it off to save power,` Red John had informed me blandly, `now can we please carry on?`

`Only if she feels up to it, you bastard,` Jane had snapped back.

`You should stop insulting me mister Jane,` Red John had replied coolly with a much more sinister edge to his voice, `or have you already forgotten what happened last time? It must piss you off so badly that you're sitting opposite the man you hate most in the world and you can't fulfill your dirty vengeful desires.`

`That's enough Jesse,` I'd told him standing abruptly to my feet as I felt slightly better than I had before.

`Would you quit calling me Jesse?` Red John muttered darkly.

`Are you sure you feel up to carrying on?` Jane had asked with a worried tone.

`We need to keep moving or we will die,` I'd pointed out swallowing nervously.

`Okay but if you're feeling weak again just say so and we'll stop for a few minutes.`

`Okay but you do the same,` I'd agreed giving him a kind smile although I doubt he could see it.

`Could we quit the boring chitchat, _please?_` Red John had complained.

Jane had then switched on the flashlight making us all blink at the sudden brightness of it before adapting to it, I helped Red John to his feet and considered asking Jane to help me by taking the killer's other side but he would never go for it so I said nothing as we carried on our less than hopeful journey. It was basically the same as before apart from the fact we stopped to rest at what I hoped were regular intervals, Jane's breathing I noticed was becoming more ragged as walking aggravates broken ribs but none of us collapsed.

I admit to feeling a slight shame that I was weak enough to falter like I had but I couldn't have been in a much worse situation to be honest, our hopes of finding an exit were still becoming more and more depleted as we carried on, again I haven't a clue how long it took but finally a miracle happened. We found a way out."


	7. VII: Calling for Help

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

This is a longer chapter again. I'm sorry, I am so sorry

Thank you In The Name, Jisbon4ever and allanon9 for reviewing

* * *

"There it was right in front of us, a fork in the tunnel with the right side leading deeper into it while on the left side was a minuscule speck of light in the distance, a speck where the sun's heroic rays shone through into the otherwise darkness.

Jane turned to exchange a joyful relieved smile with me before we pushed on towards the speck with renewed vigor and a fresh rush of adrenaline which shoved aside our despair and gave us new hope. Jane even switched off the flashlight while we moved towards our salvation, the closer we got the bigger the speck became, growing into a full sized exit.

We had to blink repeatedly to readjust our eyes to the light of day as we made it to the outside, I don't think I've ever felt a more thorough relief than did walking out. There was a wind blowing, such a blissfully beautiful breeze that gently combed through my tangled hair. The sky was a light bright blue with a single fluffy cotton cloud that sat beside the smiling sunshine, the sky had never looked more amazing.

`Give me your cell Jesse,` I'd asked after a few minutes of basking in the daylight.

`Would you quit calling me Jesse you stupid bitch,` Red John had spat bitterly in reply.

`Hey! You should be nicer to her,` Jane had pointed out, `without her you'd be dead, she saved your life. Remember that when you're bleeding slowly to death.`

`Jane please,` I'd moaned tiredly and Jane had shot us both a dark look but was silent.

Red John fished the phone from his pants pocket with his free hand and gave it to me, it happened to be my bad hand which didn't agree with me grasping it and instead let the cell slip from my fingers into the grass beside me.

`Imbecile,` Red John had complained blandly as Jane went to pick it up wincing at the strain it put on his ribs, he retrieved it none the less.

`Hey Cho,` Jane said cheerfully after a minutes where it had been ringing, `… yes its Jane, could you come get us please… meh, Lisbon arrested Red John days ago… because the phone says it's the 25th… no it doesn't say where we are, check the GPS or whatever cops usually track these things with… we were stuck in a mine if you must know… come find us and we'll give you details… thank you… see you soon.`

`Are they on their way?` I'd asked, okay it was kind of obvious but I was still dazed that we were saved.

`Yes,` Jane had confirmed offering me a smile, `we're going to be okay. Except you Red John, you're going to die soon so enjoy the sunshine while you can.`

`You should have said that to your wife,` Red John had taunted with a slight smirk, `I'm sure she much rather would have enjoyed living another to see the next day, it was such a lovely day. I would have let her live but in the end she begged me to kill her and end the pain, she begged like the worthless coward she was. I can only imagine how screwed up your little girl was, I did her a great favor by ending her miserable life.`

Jane's expression had been darkening the entire time he was speaking while his fist clenched and before I could react he slammed his fist into Red John's smug face. The killer flew backwards onto the ground as I put myself between Jane when he tried to advance on him.

`Jane, take a walk,` I'd told him to which his glare only deepened as he tried to get around me, `Jane, I said take a walk!`

`Why do you insist on defending that human piece of garbage?` Jane had demanded furiously, `he butchered my family and you don't think the bastard deserves to die for that? You don't think my family deserves justice? What the hell is wrong with you Lisbon?`

`You'll get justice,` I'd said calmly trying not to feel like I was betraying him, `except you'll get it the right way, through a court of law. Now take a walk.`

`I hate you Lisbon,` Jane had snapped before abruptly stalking off.

I'd be lying if I said that didn't hurt. I know he probably didn't mean it, you know how much Red John gets to him, even more so in person. And you know what boss? I do think Red John deserved to die, I do think Jane had every right to kill him but I became a cop for a reason. I'm an officer of the law, we can't just kill everyone who has wronged us or else there wouldn't be many people left and to hell with order. An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind, I don't know who said that but it's good. Besides, how could I have lived with myself if I had let Jane kill him? Then I'd have to arrest him and he's my friend, I don't want to have to see him rot in a jail cell for the rest of his life…" I paused for a minute realizing I had completely gone off into a tangent which she probably didn't want to hear although it was hard tell since she was busy writing down what I was saying, that was what I assumed she was writing anyway, "sorry boss, let me continue.

`He punched me,` Red John had complained from the ground, `he should be arrested for assault.`

`I didn't see him punch you,` I'd replied neutrally turning to look down on him as he spat out a mouthful of blood.

`Yes you did,` he'd stated indignantly.

`No I didn't.`

`Yes you did.`

`I didn't, any injury you received to your jaw was the result of the fall earlier,` I informed him expressionlessly, `and that was your own fault.`

`As I recall you were the one you tackled me down the mine shaft,` he'd pointed out.

`You were the one resisting arrest!` I'd protested, `how was I supposed to know there was a bloody mineshaft there?`

`Just help me up,` he snarled glaring at me intently to which I had rolled and my eyes and reluctantly helped him up, feeling great pleasure at his grimacing over his ankle, `thank you,` he'd added sarcastically.

`Your welcome,` I'd told him with equal sarcasm, suppressing a smile at the bruise already appearing on his face. We both know he deserved that one.

We'd waited for a time, me standing there supporting Red John while Jane stood away from us occasionally giving us dark looks from time to time. I'd felt relieved when I finally heard the ugly, yet strangely soothing sirens accompanying the police and ambulance.

`Jane's serious about killing me isn't he?` Red John had asked quietly as they came into view, I really didn't feel like answering that question… I don't… I can't remember what happened after that…" I swallowed nervously as I halted my speech, "these must be some kickass painkillers, right boss? Although I'm sure you probably know the rest."

Hightower finally paused in what she was writing, closed the file and threw it onto the pile, still with that sorrowful expression in her eyes, the same one Minelli had had when Sam and his team had been attacked.

"Jane will be okay boss," I said comfortingly, "he's Jane, he'll be okay."

Hightower I think had stopped listening to me, she just sat staring through me with her tired eyes. I was about to ask her if she was okay when her phone rang, she bit her lip before hesitantly reaching out and answering it.

"Okay, I'll be right there," Hightower told the speaker sadly.

"I guess we can continue some other time, maybe when they tone down these meds a bit," I shrugged wondering who she was meeting, "I think I'll go see Jane at the hospital."

Hightower sighed deeply before standing and striding purposely out of the room, I followed her feeling slightly rejected she hadn't bothered to dignify me with an answer. I stopped abruptly in my tracks however when I noticed a distraught looking Jane leaning against the wall, with equal parts surprise and relief I went over to him.

"I thought you were in a coma," I stated and he looked up at me with a dumbfounded expression, "you should really be at the hospital, Hightower and Cho are really worried about you."

He didn't bother answering me but tears suddenly exploded from his eyes as he threw his arms around me crying softly. I felt utterly confused by his reaction and attempted lamely to comfort him.

"It's okay Jane," I muttered unsurely, "whatever's wrong… I'm sure it'll be okay."

"No it won't!" he sobbed pulling away to look at me miserably, "don't you even remember what happened? Lisbon I'm so sorry, I'm so so sorry."

"Is this about when you said you hated me?" I wondered bewildered but was distracted by another familiar voice.

"I want to see her," my brother Tommy was saying, I snapped my head in the direction of the voice and sure enough I saw him talking to Hightower.

I went to mention this to Jane but he was gone, had he even been there? Shaking my head I made a mental note to ask for different painkillers before strolling over to my brother and Hightower. It had been awhile since I saw him but there was no mistaking those glowing green eyes, the same as our mother, and that mad sprawl of brown locks he claimed passed for hair.

"I want to see my sister," he said again even more firmly.

"I'm right here," I announced but he was so engrossed with Hightower he still didn't notice me.

"Okay," Hightower agreed leading him into the elevator, she must have thought I'd already left to go see Jane. I realized I was standing there like a lemon and raced for the elevator reaching it just in time before the doors closed, "I am ver-"

"Please, just spare me the false apologies," Tommy snapped at her darkly, apparently still not realizing I was there. I couldn't decide whether to laugh at their ignorance or be frustrated by them and why was he talking to Hightower anyway?

"But I-"

"Just shut up," Tommy repeated cutting her off for the second time as it pinged to a halt.

I spun to see we were at the lowest floor, the morgue. I was feeling suddenly anxious, Hightower must be losing it if she though I had gone to the morgue, had she even been listening to what I was saying? I angrily supposed not as I ran after them as they hadn't bothered to wait for me, I had definitely decided on frustrated.

They stopped by those drawers they keep the corpses in, I stood deliberately opposite Tommy but he only looked down at the drawer Hightower was preparing to open. I wondered if it was Red John, but why would he want to see Red John's body? Hightower slowly pulled the drawer out part way, enough for him to see the head and prepared to lift the blue cloth covering the corpse.

"Are you ready?" Hightower asked him gently and he nodded as tears welled in his eyes, why was he sad about Red John being dead?

With that she folded the cloth back and stepped back, Tommy and I instantly fell to our knees in shock. Immediately my brother began crying, tears ran rivers down his cheeks as he stroked the corpses' hair. I felt a lump in my own throat, I couldn't believe it, it couldn't be true, I didn't want it to be true. Choked tears started to fall from my eyes as I realized why everyone was sad, why everyone was ignoring me.

I was dead.


	8. VIII: After Life

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

The film is The Sixth Sense for those who wanted to know, best movie of all time in my opinion and also the best twist which is why I got the idea for this.

Thank you In The Name and Jisbon4ever for reviewing

* * *

"How can I be dead?" I wondered aloud, "I don't even remember dying… everything was supposed to be okay, we were being rescued. What happened? Boss? Tommy?"

They remained completely oblivious to me, Hightower stood a few steps away giving Tommy some privacy to mourn with that same sorrowful expression while Tommy silently cried. It was so weird being so close to him, on an eye level with him and he hadn't the faintest clue I was there. Even stranger than that was seeing my lifeless self lying on the slab, I really was gone.

"Oh Teresa," he whispered suddenly, "too busy saving the world to save yourself, huh?"

"Something like that," I mumbled sadly looking at the grief in his eyes, I'd always thought that eventually I could mend the rift between my siblings but now I never will.

"I'm sorry sis," he apologized, "you were always there for me and I just keep screwing up, I never even told you how much I appreciated what you did after Mom died… you can't even hear me now, can you?"

"Yes I can, I'm right here," I told him choking on the words as I tried to wipe my eyes, "you just can't see me."

"I love you Teresa," he added planting a kiss on my corpse's head, "we'll miss you… and remember to say hi to Mom for me okay?"

With that he stood pulled the cloth back over to cover my face and wiped his eyes nodding to Hightower he was done. She closed the drawer and gently led him away, I opted not to follow them and instead curled into a ball and sobbed.

I always knew on the job my life was in danger but I just assumed when you died you knew you were dead and were automatically at peace, you weren't supposed to be attacked by all the things you had intended to do at some point but hadn't gotten around to… how had this happened? I could hear the sirens and see the vehicles pulling in to help us… how had I ended up dead?

Suddenly I wanted to know, didn't I have a right to know how I had died? Pulling myself together I wiped my eyes and stood up, determined to find out, I deserved that much at least. I had no idea how to find out though, I couldn't exactly ask anybody as no one could see me- my stomach was suddenly gripped by ice, why had Jane been able to see me? What if he had died too?

I scowled pondering this, he could definitely see me and had even hugged me but then why had he disappeared? Why not stay with me? Feeling unbelievably confused I decided to go find Hightower, maybe the file she'd been writing in had some answers. I took the stairs feeling despair as others walked past without seeing me but still managed to reach her office, the file had been moved though to which I sighed frustrated.

"There you are Lisbon," Jane said and I spun to face him as he looked at me with a mixture of guilt and relief.

"I'm dead Jane," I informed him bluntly suppressing a fresh wave of misery at that statement.

"I know," he muttered sadly, "I guess I owe Van Pelt an apology about the afterlife."

"Are you dead too?" I forced myself to ask biting my lip as I waited for his reply.

"Not yet," he answered, "doctors keep reviving me."

"You sound almost like you want to die," I pointed out hearing the bitterness in his tone.

"Maybe I do want to die," he told me darkly before abruptly vanishing.

I blinked a few times to make sure I wasn't seeing things, he really had just disappeared right in front of me. I hoped that meant he'd been revived again which I was grateful for, I didn't want Jane to be dead too.

Sighing miserably I left Hightower's office and decided I need a walk outside, it was night out by now with dozens of stars looking apologetically down on me. Staring up at the thousands of pinpoints of light illuminating the darkness was oddly comforting as I strolled through the streets, I'd never paid much attention to the night sky before but it was beautiful… It would have been nice to be alive and to see it but that could never be.

I was transfixed by the sky as I walked, it made me wonder what was going to happen to me. I couldn't stay… as a ghost for the rest of eternity could I? I doubted it, there had to be more. As soon as I found out how I died. And found out about Jane.

After awhile the stars started to fade away and I watched the golden disk of the sunrise through the magnificent streaks of the dawn sky, normally I wasn't a morning person but I didn't feel tired. I wasn't hungry or thirsty and all my injuries had miraculously healed, some of the pluses of being dead but I oddly missed those feelings.

"Hello Teresa."


	9. IX: Remembering the Past

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film I got the idea for this from.

Yes its the one with the famous "I see dead people" line. I'm sorry this took so long to update, just having a rough day. Hope you like it anyway and by the way the italics is her remembering, like a flashback.

Thank you MentalistLover, Jisbon4ever and In The Name for reviewing

* * *

Instantly I stopped with a chill seeping through my skin as I turned to face my speaker. He was smirking at me with a deranged smile as his sapphire eyes glinted dangerously in the sun's rays, his arms were folded while he watched me seeming completely unfazed by the fact we were dead.

"Hello Jesse," I greeted him cautiously.

"I thought you'd be happy to see me," he spoke cheerfully while slowly approaching me, "since we're dead and all, you don't have that much of a choice of who you speak to."

"I had sort of been hoping you'd be rotting in some deep, dark hole by now," I told the killer honestly but it didn't even dent his smile.

"That's not very kind Teresa," Red John commented, "although I suppose your reaction could have been worse."

"Don't you even care you're dead?" I demanded feeling irritated by him and his incredibly calm demeanor.

"You don't remember do you?" he retorted with a hint of amusement to which I scowled, why did I have to develop amnesia now of all times? "I'm sure it'll come to you, maybe I can help."

"I don't want your help," I snapped at him, "unless you actually want something you can go burn in hell now, okay?"

"Fine. Be that way," he replied indignantly, "there's plenty of other things to do around here."

"Like what?"

"Like… never mind," Red John replied sounding irritated.

"Bored already?" I mocked to which his expression darkened, "I'm dead Jesse, what are you going to do? Kill me?"

A wave of dizziness took me while my smile fell away, memories flickered through my mind like a movie, a bad movie where I died. So vividly I could suddenly recall what I had forgotten, I knew how I had died.

"_Jane's serious about killing me isn't he?" Red John had asked quietly as they came into view, "I'm not going to live much longer… I might as well take the rest of Jane's spirit with me."_

"_What the hell are you talking about?" I demanded feeling puzzled._

"_I am truly sorry for this Teresa," he continued rambling blinking in pain from his ankle, "you've been good to me."_

_I opened my mouth to demand again to know what he was talking about but closed it abruptly as a sudden sharp pain shot from my abdomen, I looked horrified into Red John's expressionless eyes before slowly lowering my gaze to see a bloody blade protruding from my gut as it dawned on me what he'd done, what he'd done after I had saved his worthless traitorous life._

"_Should have checked me for weapons when you arrested me," he whispered coldly into my ear._

_My strength wavered as I felt the life spilling out of me with the blood as he pulled out the knife and I fell, everything seemed to be slowing down as I landed with a gentle thump onto the soft grass to stare up at the sky, such a beautiful sky._

_I turned my head slightly to see Red John trying not to let the pain show on his face as he struggled to stand alone while he brandished the knife in the air, muffled sounds of yelling and then gunshots followed and I saw his body fly back from the force of the accompanying bullets, I heard his laugh echo as he fell bleeding and dying beside me._

"_What… have… you… done?" I struggled to ask horrified by what had just transpired._

"_I've… killed… us… both," he managed to answer before his eyelids fluttered closed and his ragged breathing came to a halt, he was dead._

_I looked away from him casting a weak glance at my surroundings, vague blurs of people started racing towards me while their distorted voices screamed my name. I told myself to hold on, I told myself it'd be okay but each breath was a forced agony, I told myself to focus on that brilliant sky but my eyes wanted so badly to close. I kept telling myself to hold on but I deep down I knew I couldn't, I knew my body couldn't take anymore despite how much I wanted it to. I could feel my pulse weakening, I could feel my life ebbing away and then my heart ceased to beat entirely, never to beat again.  
_


	10. X: What and Why

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film called "The Sixth Sense" from which I got the idea for this.

Sorry I didn't update yesterday, the library is having maintenance done on their system and the internet wouldn't connect so I couldn't actually upload it till now, I apologize hopefully they're done with it now

Thank you In The Name, allanon9 and 24Mentalistlover for reviewing

* * *

For a minute I could only gape at the smug look on my murderer's face before anger suddenly shot through me, after all I had done to save his life he had still chose to end mine.

"I take it from the way you are glaring at me you remember what happened?" Red John commented cheerfully.

"Why?" I demanded, "after all I did for you? After all we went through to survive you just killed me?"

"I was going to die anyway," he said as if it was obvious, "I couldn't lose to Jane so I had to take away all he had left, his ability to avenge his family and you."

"You killed me just to spite Jane?" I screamed at him furiously, "you bastard!"

"Oh come now Teresa," he chided calmly, "I had no other choice and it worked perfectly too," his smile returned and his sapphire eyes flickered dangerously, "you should have seen the look on his face when he saw you fall to the ground, he looked like his heart had stopped beating. He tried so hard to run to you but his broken ribs prevented it and by the time he reached you, you were dead. He cradled your body for hours sobbing uncontrollably before Cho managed to pry him away."

"You are sick," I spat at him watching the way his eyes reveled in Jane's pain.

"It's not my fault," he pointed out, "Jane's the one who so perfectly set the stage, storming off like that and the icing on the cake was the fact the very last thing he ever said to you was that he hated you, he never got to tell you he loved you. So tragic."

"What do you mean by that?" I asked confused.

"You know tragic, relating to tragedy," he answered deliberately ignoring what I meant, "something terribly sad and unfair-"

"What do you mean by he never got to tell me he loved me?" I interrupted irritably.

"Teresa you are a woman aren't you?" he questioned blandly, "you're supposed to have insight into these kinds of things, you know exactly what it means. Jane was so devastated by your death because he loved you."

"But… I mean… he would have said…" I babbled pathetically.

"You can't really blame him, you never said it either," he commented sounding almost bored, "its so amusing, and stupid, and sad that you were in love and never realized it."

"That's just silly, I don't… we're just friends… you're just trying to bother me," I retorted not wanting to discuss my feelings with the man who had murdered me, of all people.

"You know I am not," he sighed.

"Well screw you anyway," I snapped turning to walk away, "I don't have to stand here and listen to you."

"I know something you don't know," he taunted from behind me.

"I don't care," I called back firmly.

"Don't you want to know how Jane ended up in a coma?" he asked coolly.

I was forced to stop and glance tenuously back at him, on one hand I despised everything about him and loathed his very company but on the other it wasn't exactly like I could go ask one of the team what had happened. Regardless of whether or not I loved him, I still had to know what had happened to him.

"How?"

"Now you want to speak me?" he mocked, "how cruel of you, you only want to speak to me when I have information you need."

"Want to talk about cruel? You _murdered_ me," I told him icily, "now are you going to tell me or not?"

"Fine," Red John shrugged, "but you won't like it."

"I don't care, just tell me what happened," I snapped.

"I'm just saying you won't like it."

"Just spit it out already!" I yelled at him as my patience grew tired.

"He tried to kill himself."


	11. XI: Jesse and Jane

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film called "The Sixth Sense" from which I got the idea for this.

Thank you In The Name, 24Mentalistlover and Jisbon4ever for reviewing

* * *

My jaw dropped with shocking disbelief at the news, of all the things I'd figured might have happened to him, this wasn't very high on the list, in fact it wasn't even on the list. I closed my mouth and looked into his eyes searching to see if he was telling the truth, he looked amused by my reaction but didn't seem to be lying.

"Amazing isn't it?" Red John commented smugly, "push someone too far and they fall of the ledge. Wow, I do rather like that analogy."

"Just shut up Jesse," I moaned.

"Jesse? Really, you'd think after I killed you that you'd have slightly more respect for me as a serial killer," he retorted miming hurt.

"You're insane," I pointed out, "and how do I know you're telling the truth about Jane?"

"Maybe a little, they say you have to be insane to live in this mad world," he replied smirking, "and if you don't believe me just wait until he dies again and then ask him."

"What do you mean?" I questioned feeling puzzled.

"He will either die in the coma or come out of it and kill himself, either way he becomes a ghost and can see you," Jesse answered seriously, "ain't love grand?"

"Why are you so happy?" I demanded of him, angry he was so calm, "you're dead too."

"Death isn't that bad Teresa- you don't mind me calling you Teresa do you? Since you insist on calling me Jesse its only fair- I lived a good life and now thanks to my ingenious plan I get to watch Jane suffer and soon he shall be dead," he explained indifferently, "being dead could be worse."

"You're a very sad person Jesse," I pointed out.

"That's not a very polite thing to say to someone like me," he complained.

"What are you going to do?" I wondered, "kill me twice?"

"Fine. Be like that," he shrugged, "I've got to go anyway, make sure Mom didn't screw up my funeral."

"Then go already!" I yelled at him spinning on my heel to leave, "actually wait, do you know which hospital Jane is-" I stopped speaking when I turned back to see he had already gone, "oh great, vanish why don't you! I have got to learn how to do that."

I sighed miserably and turned gloomily back to the street, at least I knew where I was at least. I began trekking through the streets to the largest hospital where I had to guess Jane had been taken too, my feet carried on automatically through the crowded streets, so full of busy, oblivious and live people. Sighing again I allowed my mind to float off and think about what Jesse had told me about Jane.

It actually wasn't too hard to believe that Jane loved me, which I found surprising but then I had strong feelings for him too. I had never admitted it before, coworkers were forbidden from dating at all and thinking of him in anything less than a platonic way had been utterly unthinkable. I had always thought I had more time to think about things like this anyway, and even if you did die you were supposed to move on to hopefully heaven, not stay stuck as a ghost worrying about your pain-in-the-ass consultant.

Just because I was dead didn't mean I wanted him to die too, he had been through so much and deserved so badly to be happy, not to kill himself in a guilt driven act of grief. He had to be okay, he just had to be okay.

That being said I did want to talk to him again, maybe I could talk some sense into him. I couldn't just sit back and watch him die permentantly anyway because… because I did love him too, I loved Patrick Jane… And I hadn't even realized it until I was dead. I paused to rub my regretful eyes, sighing again at the inconvenient timing of my death.

I glanced up and noticed I was standing outside the hospital, feeling thankful like something was finally going my way for the first time in days I bolted inside and began searching the rooms for any sign of Jane. I came to a halt when I saw Van Pelt and Rigsby, the latter of which was trying to comfort his sobbing coworker.

"Rigsby! Van Pelt!" I cried happily racing towards them again, for a second forgetting I was dead, "Wayne! Grace! It's me… Lisbon… you can't even hear me," I concluded feeling deflated as I stopped in front of them.

"He'll be okay Grace," Rigsby was saying to her soothingly as she cried onto his shoulder.

"But what if he's not?" she wailed miserably, "we've already lost Lisbon and… and Jane's in a coma and he doesn't even want to survive."

"He'll pull through," Rigsby told her gently holding her tightly, "just have a little faith okay, he'll be okay… Oh hey Hightower… boss…" he added nervously but Van Pelt didn't seem to care as Hightower approached them from behind me.

"It's okay Wayne," Hightower told him to my surprise entering the room beside them.

Hesitantly I peeked inside the door and saw it was Jane's room, the blond was lying on the body hooked up to a vast array of various tubes, wires and machines accompanied by an irritating symphony of bleeping and humming, Cho was sitting beside him. He looked rough, it was the first time I had ever seen him with stubble or with those dark rings hanging under his eyes. Worry was etched onto his face along with Hightower as they gazed down at poor Jane, who's ringed eyes seemed firmly closed. I could feel my eyes brimming with tears as I moved over to him, it was horrible to see him like this.

"Hi Jane," I muttered uncertainly.

"Hi Lisbon," he replied from behind me.


	12. XII: To Live or to Die

I do not own "The Mentalist" or any of its characters and I gain no financial profit from writing this. Also I don't own the film called "The Sixth Sense" from which I got the idea for this.

I am so sorry its taken ages to update, I got grounded and couldn't go the library obviously.

Thank you Jisbon4ever, 24Mentalistlover, allanon9 and worf 412 for reviewing

* * *

Almost as soon as he'd spoken the high pitched screech of Jane flatling pierced the air, medical personal instantly rushed in while Hightower and Cho were shooed away while they tried to save his life. It all became a muted blur as I slowly turned to face Patrick Jane, if I were still alive my heart would have been beating like crazy.

"I take it you realize what happened?" Jane asked sorrowfully.

"Yes," I answered simply and remembering how little time I might have I jumped right in, "why do you want to die so badly? Jesse's dead, your family's been avenged."

"Why do I want to die?" he repeated looking confused, "how can I possibly live with myself? I got my family killed, I failed to kill Red John and you… I couldn't save you," he choked on the last words and I saw the tears building in his eyes, "Red John killed you because of me, I couldn't even reach you before you died… and… and the last thing I ever said to you was that I hated you, I didn't mean that Lisbon, I so, so did not mean that."

"Jane," I began feeling tearful myself as I approached him, "its not your fault. If anything I was the one who kept saving him, I was the one who didn't bother checking him for weapons, I was the one who forgot he had that knife."

"It's not your fault Lisbon," he told me firmly, "you were just trying to do your job, I'm supposed to be the one with the good memory. I should have known, I got you killed Lisbon… I was supposed to always save you."

"No you weren't," I replied forcefully, "Jesse's the one who killed me, Jesse's the one who should be blamed… He wants you to die, he likes that you're suffering. Don't help him, you have to fight, you have to fight and you have to live."

"How can I bear to live without you?" he asked quietly sounding suddenly so scared, "I… I… I love you Lisbon."

Despite myself I couldn't help but smile at hearing those words coming from his lips, I couldn't help the surge of joy I felt hearing that even though our current situations seemed caught between hopeless and grim. I felt the tears spill from my eyes as I tenderly caressed his cheek, forgetting for one blissful second I was dead and this could never be.

"I love you too," I whispered quietly fighting to speak over the lump in my throat, "and if you really do love me, I want you to promise to try. To at least try, for the team… Don't let Jesse win again."

He looked at me for a minute, through the sheen of tears shielding his eyes I still managed to loose myself in their depth, how had I never realized before he had such beautiful eyes? Screw that, why hadn't I realized I loved him?

"Are you sure Lisbon?" he questioned, "if I just died, we could be together like this. We could be together for all time, be together like we should have had the chance to."

It was so tempting to say he was right, it was suddenly so unbelievably hard not to tell him he was right. Looking into his eyes, I just wanted to him to hold me in his arms forever, for all time sounded so nice and it wasn't like he wanted to live… But on the other hand, the team was so devastated. They needed him, Jane had a life with them at the CBI and unlike me he could have it back. He'd been through so much and I wanted him to live, he deserved to be happy again. He might not want to live his life without me, but I didn't want to spend eternity doomed with the guilt of my selfishness. I loved him.

"Lisbon?" he wondered as I dropped my hand and stared at the floor, I felt his arms encircling me and smiled at the warmth and comfort they offered, "Lisbon?"

I looked up at him again, I loved him, I loved him more than I'd ever loved another man. Knowing that I made my choice, no matter how hard it was I knew what was the right thing to do.

* * *

I've made up my mind but just out of curiosity who wants him to live and who wants him to die?


End file.
